PART 2
I have found that some of my own muscle and joint pains, as well as depression and anxiety, have been triggered or made worse by food allergies, certain chemicals and by nutritional deficiencies. I eliminated wheat and refined white sugar and became free of the anxiety attacks and severe depression that crippled me since my teenage years. By correcting a magnesium deficiency, I reduced chronic muscle pain by half. My pain has also taught me to become more outspoken and expressive, to get more sleep, to exercise according to my needs and to decrease stress. Pain has taught me to live more consciously within my limits.

Some pain should never be limited or eliminated too quickly, even if it may feel overwhelming. The loss of a relationship or death of a loved one as well as the loss and grief one experiences living with chronic illness should be felt fully and mourned. The pain should run it’s natural course, otherwise it may cause difficulties later.

Then there is the insidious kind of pain that seems to have no message or purpose. Or by the time we realize what the message or purpose is, there is already permanent damage done to the body. It is often excruciating, disruptive and untreatable. For this category of pain, I found I must “go into it”. What does this mean? I allow myself to acknowledge and fully experience my frustration, resentment, grief and outrage over my suffering. I also allow myself to feel and experience the physical pain in its entirety. I embrace it and become one with it. I surrender to it and I flow along with it and allow it to flow through me.


I must come to accept it and learn to function within it. I must make pain my companion rather than my enemy. I have found that if I fully accept, rather than resist, the pain in this way then it no longer has the same power over my life. Initially in my illnesses I did a lot of cure chasing which eventually led me to realize that I was wasting a lot of time, energy and money. I found that I made more progress when I focused on learning how to live with my illness and within my limits.

Learning to live with pain is a difficult process. It is not a recipe that is the same for everyone. It does, however, require a commitment to ourselves and a willingness to confront and challenge our social conditioning. We must give ourselves permission to feel without labels, judgments or time limits. We must let go of societies expectations and listen to our internal wisdom. It is important to support people in their efforts to listen to their internal wisdom and to validate their findings.


At times it may be hard for us to hear the messages carried in our pain or to appreciate them because the pain is too great. There may be setbacks into old thinking patterns and we may not be able to accept, flow and find meaning for a while. We may feel angry at our fate. All of this is part of the natural coping process, too, and it needs to be felt and respected. In no way does the fact that pain carries valuable messages for us minimize the frustration and suffering one endures, but I believe it is possible and necessary to honor both the wisdom received and the suffering.
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Cynthia Perkins, M.Ed. is a holistic health counselor specializing in issues of living with chronic illness, chronic pain and disability as well as sexual intimacy. She is also author of the inspirational E-Book Finding Life Fulfillment when Living with Chronic Illness-A Spiritual Journey. Services, Ebooks and a FREE Newsletter can be found at her website. http://www.holistichelp.net/ or send any email to this address to subscribe to the FREE Newsletter mailto:Holistichelp-subscribe@topica.com

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